Mind Over Medium

Turning Adversity into Art: A chat with Nika Maples

Lea Ann Slotkin Season 1 Episode 24

Ever pondered what it takes to transform adversity into a colorful array of achievements? Nika Maples, an inspirational author and coach, joined me to unravel her own tapestry of life. From conquering the fallout of a stroke that rendered her quadriplegic at 20 to becoming an empowering figure for individuals yearning to etch their stories into the annals of published literature, Nika's narrative is as vivid as the color-themed magazine she once published—and as bold as the artwork she chose for her book cover, artwork that I had the privilege of creating.

Embrace the fearless "Why Not?" mindset with us as we venture through past victories like Teacher of the Year and tackle the psychological barriers that often anchor us before we even set sail. This episode is more than just a conversation; it's a roadmap for navigating life's contests, discerning when to leap into opportunities, and how to orchestrate the seemingly impossible, like a dual celebration of a Writers Conference paired with a milestone birthday bash, all with just a six-week notice. Inspiration strikes in the tales of steadfast determination and the joys that follow when we push beyond our comfort zones.

Finally, we wade through the emotional swamps that writers often find themselves mired in, seeking solid ground on the other side. Doubts and fears of judgment are but mirages we confront, offering advice that transforms writing trepidation into a wellspring of creativity. The episode closes on a note of gratitude and growth, a reminder to cherish the shared moments of artistic expression and personal success. Join us on this journey, where double doors of opportunity await and where every chapter encourages you to craft your own story with heart, resilience, and a dash of playfulness.

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Lea Ann Slotkin :

Welcome to Mind Over Medium, a podcast for artists who want to make money doing what they love. When you tune in a twink, you will learn how to attract your ideal commissions, approach galleries for representation, have a great online launch of your work, and how to do it all with less overwhelm and confusion. You will have the opportunity to hear from amazing artists who will share how they have built their successful creative businesses. My hope is to create a space where artists and the creative curious can gather to learn about one of the most important tools creative entrepreneurs need in their toolbox their mindset. Thanks so much for tuning in to Mind Over Medium podcast. Let's get started.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Hello, I hope everyone is doing well. Today. I'm excited to spend some time with my dear friend, nika Maples. I'm really excited to talk to you. Nika is an author and coach who helps Christian coaches, speakers and influencers write books, and you do a bunch of other things too, but that's kind of your tagline on your website that I just stole so you can do me the favor of introducing yourself. Let us know who you are, where do you live, and just give us some more detail about what you do.

Nika Maples:

Sure, thanks for having me, leanne. I'm just so honored to be welcomed into a group of artists here today. When an English type person gets welcomed in with the cool artist kids, it feels really like a special day. I live in Fort Worth, texas, and I've been a coach for about four years helping other people achieve their dreams of writing a book, but before that I was just doing it all for myself.

Nika Maples:

I've written six books and I was originally a classroom teacher in a high school English capacity and I love seeing kids have big wins. And when I realized I can help adults have big wins and write a book save dream, dreamt of their whole lives, that's when I really kind of shifted toward coaching instead of just doing writing and speaking myself. Something that's kind of unique about me is that I experienced a brainstem stroke when I was 20 years old and was quadriplegic, so I learned how to walk and talk again when I was 20. I'm not only in the speaker, I'm a speaker who deals with the disability. At times I mean, sometimes it doesn't really affect me, but I always have a cane and I have mobility issues and I've had to be creative to find ways to navigate life with the disability and have success in my business at the same time.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, yeah, you're remarkable. You always inspire me and that's where we met was in our coaching certification. Yes, I feel very fortunate. Well, you kind of touched on this a little bit, but maybe it'll be quite a little bit of a different answer to describe a time in your life when you felt the most creative.

Nika Maples:

You know, when you told me you were going to ask that, ask me that question immediately. I thought of a time let's see in 2019 and 2020,. I had a run of a magazine. I produced my own magazine, published my own magazine.

Nika Maples:

I just found it out there, yeah, and that is when I got to incorporate a lot of visual elements in the writing that I do, because I was the one that would edit submissions for the articles. But then also I chose all of the images and I found that to be so thrilling to create a magazine that my magazine was quarterly and it was all based around a particular color for each quarter.

Nika Maples:

So we had a green magazine and orange magazine and a red magazine and so on, and so all of the images in the red magazine were red. I mean they had something in it that was dominant, that was red, and people to this day say, wow, that magazine is so fun. If I sell it at my events, you know I'm not continuing to publish it but they say it's so fun, it's so beautiful and they always mention the quality of the paper. I felt so creative because I had my hands in every single aspect of publishing that magazine. I chose the paper that we used, I chose the images, I chose the fonts that we used and I felt so creative for those two years. But it was an exhausting process. Every time I was like, yes, we got this issue out and starting to start the next issue.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

You don't even get to take a breath. I would guess between them.

Nika Maples:

And putting one out of a quarter seems like that's not a long time in between. It's just not, though, so you don't have a breath, so I had to stop that, but I definitely felt creative during that period.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, that's great. I miss magazines. I used to get, you know, have the ones that I would, you know, have sent to my house and would love sitting down and flipping through them, and I just don't do that anymore.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, you can. Only people buy a one off specialty magazine if they see somebody that they want to read an interview about, or they'll buy a one off magazine but not a subscription.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, I know I kind of miss that though. Well, thank you for sharing that, and that does sound like an amazingly creative time, and I don't think I realized you had that cool color theme throughout, so that's a great idea, so cool. Well, I have the honor of having my artwork be on the cover of one of your books.

Nika Maples:

Yes, I love your artwork so much.

Nika Maples:

I don't know it just captures kind of the feel of my aesthetic is I just like bright colors, really bright colors in my home, and your artwork is usually the. A lot of the pieces I've seen are very bright, so I'm drawn to them, and so when I was putting together my book page one to page done, which is about how to write a book the piece of art that I chose of yours has nothing to do with books. It's not like it's a painting of a book, it's a vase of a bouquet, and I don't know, though, I was so drawn to that particular one that I just it was thrilling to me to ask can I put that on the cover of my book? I like my books to be very unique and to have my own personal story behind how I chose the cover and how I chose the different things inside. So it was exciting to me that you said yes, and people love the cover of that book, so it's magnetic. You just want to pick it up.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Well, it was a huge honor for me and the first time I'd ever had that happen, so it was very exciting. Here's a question for you Do you feel like everyone has a book in them?

Nika Maples:

Well, I'm going to ask you a question.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Oh, I see how this is going to go.

Nika Maples:

Do you think everyone can be an artist? I do.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I really do. I'm not saying it doesn't might require some work or developing a skill that might be laying dormant or not developed, but yes, I think everyone is creative if they want to be.

Nika Maples:

Yes, that is my mentality about writing a book. I do believe that everyone can write a book, that they can do it. I do believe that everybody has a story that's worth telling, or insights that are worth sharing, or lessons that are worth teaching through the written word. The thing that you may agree with this, leigh Ann, I'm not sure. I think that the business of writing a book is the part that people may not want to do. Not everyone may want to do that, whereas with art, with visual art, the business of being a bit visual artist may not be the part that everyone is suited for Exactly.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I agree 100%.

Nika Maples:

It takes a lot of persistence and drive. I think almost everybody I mean when I tell them that I'm a book coach and a trainer of all authors. Almost everyone says, oh, I've always wanted to write a book. It doesn't matter what their profession is, I've always wanted to write a book. I think there is something that you long to leave your mark, you long to leave your legacy. You don't want to have lived your life, lived your story and have it just end with you. You kind of want to leave something behind. I think it's natural to want to create a book that tells why you made the decisions you did and how you survived what you did. But then to sell it, to market it, all of that takes a different temperament. Not everybody would want to do that. That's why they act like, oh, writing a book would be so hard, that would be the hard part. I would say no, no, no. Writing it is not the hard part. Writing is the easy part. It's selling it and continuing to sell it. That is the hard part.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, it's a pretty. I don't know what the word is. I'm looking for interesting industry, Isn't it like mine? It has its quirks and things that most people are not familiar with unless you're in it.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, there's a lot of little quirks and industry standards and insider information. For instance, books are published on a Tuesday. Most people don't know that. I always like to tell people that, yes, if you start looking it up, most books are published on a Tuesday. You can tell whether a book is traditionally published or self-published.

Nika Maples:

One of the secrets is the page numbers divisible. Are the page numbers divisible by 16.? Because, so random it says, they take a stack of papers, fold it and the sections of a book are actually folded and they're called signatures and it's stitched into the spine. Well, a self-published book cannot have that process for the printing, where four pages are folded to make eight, folded to make 16. And they don't have that process of stitching. It's a different kind of process where you can have an unlimited number of pages, because it's more like Xerox copied.

Nika Maples:

Okay, what's fascinating, instead of a print where they have metal plates that are etched and used with ink that's what traditional publishing houses use is they have huge offset printing it's called offset printing facilities where they can print a million copies and so it's hard to fix the typo because the text has been etched into a metal plate so they can't go really quickly. It's very expensive to fix one little typo. So there's all these things that people don't really realize. Until they get it, they're like, oh okay, so that's why every once in a while you find a book that has blank pages at the end. Sometimes you're like, why are there blank pages back here? I don't get it. Why do we have so many pages? Or why are there so many advertisements? They'll have advertisements that did you see? This Followed by this author in this book, and the reason they do that is because the author had finished what they had to say and there were more pages left in that group of 16.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

So they have to fill them up.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, fascinating.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Oh my gosh, People are learning so much. You probably don't even remember this offhand comment you said to me it's been a couple of years. We were chatting about something and it really stuck with me. I think you were talking about some cool speaking gig or opportunity that you had and we were talking about it. I'm like how did these things come up for you? And you said this and it has stuck with me.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

You said I swing at everything that comes my way. I was like dang it, nika, that's awesome and I just want well, first, it made such an impact on me and I want to know have you always been that way? Is it still true? Just unpack that a little bit, that philosophy.

Nika Maples:

Yes, I think that in general people like to wait for the perfect pitch. You know they're like well, what is the likelihood that I will be successful with this if I take a swing at it? And we wait, and we. It's almost like they say of batters in the batter's box you know, don't be caught, don't be caught. Looking Like, don't strike out, while you're just looking and that's like almost a shameful thing for a baseball player is like just to keep looking and looking and waiting for the pitch. They would rather go out swinging. You know, and that's what I find that a lot of entrepreneurs do is they are like let me evaluate this opportunity. Is it really going to pay it out for me? What is my likelihood of it being a home run? And I realized you have a lot better likelihood of getting a home run if you swing at everything. Just swing, even a bad pitch, you can hit it and make some progress. So that's what I've started doing, and I guess I've kind of always done it, because I love contests.

Nika Maples:

My first contest I was five years old when I won my first contest. It was a bank contest to have a coloring page. And they would. If you had the best coloring page. They would start you a savings account with $10 in it. And I won. And it was like I'm going to enter every contest I can, so like I had just entered contests at libraries and contests at banks and contests at and that's how I won.

Nika Maples:

Texas Teacher of the Year is because I saw it as one big contest. It was like, oh, I found out here, if I'm a classroom teacher, the contest is the state Teacher of the Year competition and I'm like I can write an essay that people will notice and I don't care if there's 300,000 teachers in the state of Texas, I can stand out. I just believe. Why not? Why not believe you could win? And then, sure enough, I did. So that's what I guess. I have always had that philosophy of just why not? Who cares if you lose the contest? And in some cases it's. Who cares if you lose the bid? Who cares if you lose the job? Who cares if you lose the opportunity? Who cares if you lose the consultation? Who cares if you lose whatever it is, the gig? It's all just one big contest you can enter every day. Find the next thing you want to enter and see if you can win.

Nika Maples:

And I think it's so fun to win a new client, to win a new publishing opportunity and for your listeners, to win a new spot to hang your work or to win a new commission to create a particular work Then the more you do it, the more it takes to sting out Absolutely.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, it's not even really losing, it's like yeah.

Nika Maples:

I'm not kidding it, because you've already entered. Since the last time you entered that one, you've been at four more things. You've tried more and more things, and so you're like something's going to work.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, do you find it hard as you progress in your career to kind of keep that? I don't want to say it's a beginner's mindset, but it is a little bit like kind of like restarting the clock with these new opportunities. Does that mess with your hand at all?

Nika Maples:

Yeah, I think that the danger of it for me is getting too excited about too many directions and maybe your listeners would identify with, like I don't know if there's a signature look or maybe a season, because I know artists change their work and you can almost say, well, this was this season in their life, this type period in their life when they don't try to do every type of work all at once, kind of focus on painting with oils during this season, kind of collages over here and this, whatever. I find that because I want to try everything, I can spread myself a little too thin. Yeah, I want to do a magazine and I want to do a nonfiction and I want to do a fiction book and I want to do. It's so many things and they're all worthy, they're all so exciting and good, mm-hmm. But maybe the danger is thinking I'll just do more and more instead of really getting good at one thing.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, yeah, it's interesting because when you're talking about that, it's making me think about my coaching clients, and you probably experienced this too. It's like they're, before they even try to get the thing, they're already worried about having the thing that they haven't even tried to get. I'm like, how about like that which I get? That's what our brain does to try to keep us safe and not experience feelings of disappointment or failure or whatever those feelings may be For the individual. But it's just funny how that comes up.

Nika Maples:

Mm-hmm.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

For everybody.

Nika Maples:

Worrying about step 27. How am I going to get to step 2? Well, no, but I'm worried about the step 27. Yeah Well, come on back to step 2. You're never going to get to step 27. You don't really take step 2.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Exactly, exactly. Well, I want to talk about this event that you just hosted for your community, and what I'd really like to focus on about this is how, from my perspective, how decisive you were, how quickly you made this decision, swung into action and just made it happen Like it didn't seem, like there was any like should I, shouldn't I Will, I Won't I? You're just like, I'm on it, let's go.

Nika Maples:

Well, so what I put together was I wanted to have a big 50th birthday party.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Happy birthday, by the way.

Nika Maples:

Thank you, mm-hmm. You know, I just thought if there's ever a birthday party that could be really big and fun, it's got to be 40 or 50, you know, because that's when you're really celebrating a milestone. And I hadn't done anything spectacular for my 40th, so I was like 50, I'm doing it, I'm just throwing it for myself. Well, when I checked in a couple of venues, I realized it's going to cost me the same in these situations to have the venue all day, as opposed for the length of time that I wanted it. And I said, if I'm going to do it all day, then I might as well have a different event during the day and then my birthday party at night.

Nika Maples:

So I put together, I said yes to this venue, I want to sign the contract, and I put together a Writers Conference during the day 43 tickets sold and that's exactly the size of the room. So it was perfect. And then at night we had about 100 people to my birthday party and plus the people from the conference also were there. They got to come back after dinner. They went on dinner on their own, came back and it was just so memorable, so inspiring. Everyone was like I didn't even know you could throw yourself a big birthday party like this.

Nika Maples:

I was like I didn't either, but I just decided to do it, and so the weekend that we had to do it my birthday was this weekend, the January 19th, 20th weekend and when I had this idea it was December 1st.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I was shocked when you told me that, Nika.

Nika Maples:

I was like, if I'm going to do it, I have to just go ahead now. No, turning back, because it was connected to my birthday. If I had said I just want to put on a Writers Conference and a nice party, I could have moved that out 90 to 86 months. But because it was connected to my and also connected to 50. So I couldn't say, oh, we'll do it next year, we'll do it next year for my birthday, which would have been probably the wisest thing to do. I was like, well, but nobody celebrates 51. They celebrate 50. We can do it.

Nika Maples:

And I happened to have three or four friends that were like we're all on board, that's great. They helped me with the little details and I'm just thinking it's something more of us should be willing to do, just like, hey, I'm going to try and host this little event and see if people want to buy tickets, see if people want to come to the party, and there's a way that you can do it fun but also keep it a little simple. So that's what I tried to do. I didn't go overboard with hors d'oeuvres or anything at the party. We just had custom sugar cookies and it was just really fun. So I did it in about six weeks, but together a whole thing and I was tired afterwards. It was a good time.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

That's amazing. I mean, that's not a lot of time really and just to like make the decision and then go, and I feel like and I can be guilty of this I can make the decision and be like I think I'll just sit back and wait until I feel like it.

Nika Maples:

So, that's remarkable and that is interesting that you brought up feeling like it, because I want everyone to hear this whether you're a writer listening to this or a visual artist listening to this, you are not going to feel like it. You're waiting for something that will never come. I would feel like it for about two seconds and then not feel like it for a whole week, and then I'd have this burst of feeling like it for three more seconds, and then the second an obstacle would come, and there were so many obstacles. The second I would face one of those. I would be like why am I doing this? Why did I get that idea? But I kept doing things that I couldn't turn back from, so, like when I signed the contract with the venue, I could not turn back. Yeah.

Nika Maples:

So then, when I made the arrangement, with the florist who has some beautiful flowers. I kept getting deeper and deeper into it, to where I could not turn back. And that was really a good thing, because then, even though I didn't feel like it and I'll tell you, the night before I just felt sick to my stomach. It was like, why have I gotten myself into this? Even though most of it was done there wasn't any urgency I actually went to bed at 9.30 the day before. Instead of staying up all night worried about it, I was like, well, it's 9.30 and all the things that I need to do are done I still woke up in the morning and I was like, oh, I feel just sick.

Nika Maples:

Yes, the reason you do is because you've taken yourself out of your comfort zone. Yes, and it's like it makes you feel sick. You think you're going to feel fantastic on the day it actually arrives and most things are in place. I'm like no, but you know what's not in place? Other people yes, people are the wildcards. I don't know what they're going to do. You know, yeah, and it's usually this made up story of what they're going to think about us.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes, that's that wildcard in our brain. It's the wildcard in your life.

Nika Maples:

Well, I just thought I'd wrap. Maybe it was better just to leave things as is. Why'd I have to go and do this? But one thing is a driver for me that may be unique, maybe different from most people when I was in the intensive care unit when I was 20 years old and I couldn't speak, couldn't blink, couldn't move nothing, but I was awake because they had me on some medication that made my heart race and my brain race like with thoughts. I couldn't go to sleep, but I'm totally immobile and the only thing that I could do is remember. I just was like well, my eyes are closed, I can't see anything. Nobody's really in here talking to me, so I can't hear anything.

Nika Maples:

So to pass hours and hours worth of time, all I could do was remember things that I had enjoyed, replay scenes, replay memories, and after a while it was like at 20 years old, you don't have that many memories.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, like the first part of your life you don't even remember, yeah. So it was like I told myself if I ever get out of here, I'm going to make as many unique memories as I can, so that when I'm old and we're all going to get old where we don't move around as much. We're sitting on a porch or something. We're going to be remembering yeah, a lot of things, and I'm like I'm going to give myself a lot to work with. Yeah, I'm going to give myself a lot of memories to work with so that if it ever comes around that I need to spend time remembering again, I'm going to be like I've got the best treasure trove of memories to pull through. So when it came down to should I move forward with this party? I was like you know what, even if it flops, even if it's just a disaster, there'll be a memory. Yeah, yeah.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

That's amazing. Like this is the first time I think I've ever gotten choked up on my pocket. You get that. That choked me out. That's just. I mean, what a great way to live your life. I'm sorry that thing had to happen to you in order to have that thought and I'm sure people have said this to you before but what a gift. I mean, most of us go through our lives not really being that conscious of that.

Nika Maples:

Right, right. And it's not even just, it's not even trite to say that it is a gift. It's the truth. Most of us, when we've been through something, we think, well, I wouldn't want to go through it again. Yeah, but I have been changed by it, so I'm glad I went with I'm glad I went through it the way I did you become the person you are? Yeah, like I would be different. I would probably be weaker if I hadn't gone through something that made me so strong.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah.

Nika Maples:

So no, I wouldn't want to go through it again, but the lessons have been gifts.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

That's amazing. That's amazing. How difficult was it for you to write your first book.

Nika Maples:

Oh, horribly difficult, Horribly difficult. It took me a year, and some people would say that's pretty fast, but I can do it faster now. The thing that was horribly difficult about it, though, was afterwards, as soon as it came out. I can't even describe it's never happened to me since, ever happened before or since I felt tortured. If I felt like mental torture right after it came out my first one, because all of a sudden it was like I'm exposed. Yeah, I didn't realize it was going to feel like I'm exposed, and to whom I don't even know.

Nika Maples:

I don't get to control the people who pick this up. Some may be strangers, of course. That's the goal. You want strangers to pick it up and read it. You want bigger readership, and I was like, oh, I felt so terrible. What if they all think it's bad? What if they all think it's terrible? What if they laugh at me? All of the things that somebody who's put out a creative endeavor where it feels unsafe to put it out there with strangers. At least your family is going to be nice to you about it. Your friends are going to be a little bit nice. Oh, good for you. You put that out, but total strangers, you're like, am I going to be a laughing stock.

Nika Maples:

So it was hard until I realized, all right, I have a choice. I can stop doing this, I don't ever have to do it again, I don't ever have to put myself in this vulnerable position again. Or I can do it again until I get used to it. And I just thought, if I stop, I will feel more tortured because this is what I felt, like I've been made to do, like I'm made to do this, to write, and so I'm like it will feel worse not to do it. And you quoted me earlier and said something that stuck with you. The thing you said that stuck with me a year or two ago. You were talking about like the things with your business or with art that you're like I just wish it wasn't like this. I wish it weren't like this, and it's too much to remind drama or trouble or whatever you said. But I have to stop myself and say, remember, this is what little Leanne wanted. She wanted to be an artist. So like I'm not going to take that away from her.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, and I keep a picture of myself as a little girl on my desk. So I'm like okay, I can do it for you.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, do it for her yeah. And that is what I'm like. Okay, remember this. You're doing what little Nika wanted. This is all she wanted, so don't stop. Yeah, she didn't know how hard it was going to be, but like the benefits are real too.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes, true, they are yes.

Nika Maples:

I've seen something you've created that you have somebody buying it and loving it.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes, making someone happy. Yeah, it's remarkable.

Nika Maples:

I love it, you know.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah.

Nika Maples:

I've shared it with people. Yeah, I mean, that's what little Leanne and little Nika thought they were going to get out of the whole thing, and it's true, yeah, absolutely, absolutely.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

We would have tore it up when we were little, you and I we were together.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes, you know, it's so true. And I think the common thing like, if we can just normalize that, we all feel like the same way it feels hard, we don't want to do it, we want to go back to bed some days, but you just have to keep doing it If you want to, if you want to make a business out of it, right Right. If you want to write just for your own personal satisfaction and to document your life or whatever, that's 100% worthy. If you want to paint because you love it, you don't ever want to sell it 100% worthy. I think people can get confused sometimes about that.

Nika Maples:

Right, that's true, yeah.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

What was the biggest emotional block you had to overcome to get your writing career going?

Nika Maples:

It's I, this one, it's this one sentence, and I'm probably thinking that artists have the same sentence, but I'm telling you, I thought this every day at first, and all of the clients that I work with who want to write books, they all think the same thing too. And the sentence is this any good, you could be right in the middle of writing something and go wait a second is this any good?

Nika Maples:

And that was my big block, was I kept going? Who could tell me? Who could tell me if this is any good? Well, you have to take it to its completion. Like, why do you need to know? Well, the reason you need to know is because probably you're thinking because if it's not any good, I don't want to waste my time, I don't want to keep on doing it. If it's not any good, Well, the fact of the matter is, it's probably not that good, because you have a rough draft state and you could be right.

Nika Maples:

You could have been a published author for 35 years and you still have a rough draft state of this where it all begins, and it's not that great. And that's not the time to be asking is it any good? Just be like, probably not, but it's worth doing. So I'm going to do it anyway, and the good thing is you get to go back over it and go back over it and polish and polish, so that in the end it is good. No one just does a slam dunk from the very beginning of a project and each project is different. So you can be very experienced and still have a crummy writing project at the beginning. But that is the hurdle that you have to get over is wondering is it any good?

Lea Ann Slotkin :

It's just a job.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, it's a draining thought, it's a draining sentence If you're constantly asking yourself that you can't. Well, and this is what I say to my writers I'm like, okay, when you put in a cookie, like you're making cookies, and you just put the flour and the salt and maybe you stir in the eggs, you don't stop in the middle of that and go, wait, can you taste this? Is this any good? The answer is going to be no.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, it's missing a lot.

Nika Maples:

It's missing a lot. You don't have all the pieces, you have to get to a lot further along, even when all the cookie dough is actually made, all the ingredients are in there and it's ready to be dropped on the cookie sheet. People like to have a taste of it then, but even then, what you taste at that point is totally different than the experience of tasting the baked, finished cookie. It's like anytime during the process you're not going to get an absolute, complete answer. Why ask?

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah. Is there a common theme that you find comes up with your writing clients in your coaching group that is like this Is it any good? Or are there other things that are common with the group?

Nika Maples:

Oh yeah, what's really funny is everybody says, because we end up talking about marketing our books on social media or marketing or speaking, it all comes back to oh, I just don't know what people are going to think. I always say, okay, you need to tell me which person, what's the name of the person that you can't say my person, because I know.

Nika Maples:

I would never do that. I would never do that. But we've had that kind of conversation. Yes, we've been in that conversation and I that there's always a person that you're thinking of, that you're like this person is actually who I'm thinking of. You don't realize you're thinking about one. Yeah, not even a whole group of people. I've had people be like my grandma my grandma, that's who I'm worried about or my ex-boyfriend. I'm like he's your ex-boyfriend, but for a reason, you don't care what he thinks anymore, right, well, but I care what he thinks about this. I'm like why, yeah, yeah, and if, when you give a name to the person that you're like, yeah, I'm kind of thinking like what they would think of me, that takes the information out a little bit, because we have claim it to be like there's a whole bunch of people watching. Yes, there's not. You're only concerned about one person and really you could unfriend them or block them if you need to.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, exactly your grandma's probably not on social media.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, or you could just decide. Now that I've named it and I've seen that it's one, this is the other thing that I advise. I'm like okay, so your ex-boyfriend James, let's play it out. Okay, let's play it the whole way out, so he sees you marketing yourself and marketing your book. Then what happens next? And they wait out. Well, it ends up being comical. You know well, I guess I'm picturing that he would do this and say this, and when you name the person and you play it out as far as it's going to go, it lights it. Yeah. It's like, yeah, that's preposterous, and if it did happen, that's funny, like that's kind of funny that he would still care enough to make a big deal. And it's like I don't really mind as much as I thought I did, but I had made it this monster in the dark and you got a shine light on it. Shine light on it so that you can see, oh, it was only this one person and that the outcome would have been this and this, and I really don't care.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

It's interesting. I think most of our monsters have the same name, and it's they. What will they think? And then when you ask someone to get specific, sometimes it's hard to get specific because it's just this idea, it's this idea of fear that can be hard to articulate. So I will often ask my clients to do something similar. And once you try to break it down, it is so fascinating to see that it's just this thing that we've made up in our brain.

Nika Maples:

Right, right, and that person probably really is not thinking about you at all.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Absolutely yeah.

Nika Maples:

And then tumbling. Why did?

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I think, they were.

Nika Maples:

Why aren't they Absolutely? He said he was grandma she probably doesn't have. Anybody else would rather think of it Exactly.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Well, we are recording this in January and I was curious to know do you set intentions or do anything to mark the beginning of a year?

Nika Maples:

Oh, you mean like a word of the year or that kind of.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah or something you're. Yeah, goals or. I love writing down goals Do you do the word at the year.

Nika Maples:

Well, it's not exactly like a word of the year, but if I notice like a theme that starts coming up at the end, maybe in December and at the end of the year. Last year I kept thinking about double doors and seeing double doors and I was like, okay, that's what I'm going to focus on. I'm going to look for double doors. Oh, what does that mean to you? Like? Double the opportunity Nice, you know. Double the results, double the impact Just double, nice, I like it. Yeah. So that's kind of in a general way. I'm not doing anything specific regarding that. I shared this. Yeah, it just popped up to me. That might be a fun thing for your listeners to try, because I'm not sure anybody's ever mentioned this before, but because this was my last my room's, not my last birthday, certainly it's not my last birthday, but this was this last weekend.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, I had this stack of birthday cards and a lot of times we read them and then what do we do with them? Put them in a box or throw them away, and I was like, no, I am going to have these be the gift that keeps on giving. So I said I'm going to read these out loud over myself every month. We love that. So, january 21st yesterday I read it out loud over myself, for instance. There's the printed hallmarky type stuff that's in the card that everyone knows someone special, that's the day, yes, and I was like I would read it to myself and I'm like I'm that someone special. That right brightens up the day. And then, in their own handwriting, somebody might have written I love you so much, you've always been dear to me. I'm like people love me so much, I've always been dear to them, and I'm like I just did that with every single card Put them in the stack, put them in the drawer.

Nika Maples:

February 21st, march 21st, april 21st I'm going to get out of the stack and I'm going to read it again because I don't think that we get enough encouragement. I agree, we don't say it to ourselves, we don't encourage ourselves enough, and I'm just. I'm like, let me just create this little moment marker. Once a month on my birthday, the 21st. So 12 times I'm going to read these birthday cards. Get as much bang out of the buck as I can, you know, for these people that took the time to get to send it to me, and I'm like that's one thing, that is an intention that I've just decided to do for the coming year.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

That's awesome. I love that. Yeah, I'm going to do the same thing. I'm going to copy you. What thought or emotion do you feel you need to have to create success for yourself?

Nika Maples:

I have identified my top three emotions.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I haven't even prepped you for this question. You're like, I'm ready.

Nika Maples:

I'm ready, because I always ask my clients to do this. I'm like what is your zone of productivity? I say it's a triangle. You have your top three emotions. When you're in your zone of productivity, you're feeling all three at the same time. Now, you can still be productive if you're only feeling two of them or one of them, but when you're feeling all three at the same time, wow, you're productive. And for me, that's calm, playfulness and freedom. When I'm feeling calm, when I'm feeling playful and when I'm feeling free, you better back up because I'm going to create some incredible things. So that's what I notice in myself, like tension. Or I'm like oh, that's not calm, you're not going to produce what you want to produce because that's not calm. You're tense, you're stressed. Get yourself back to calm. So you said what is one of the sentences or things that I say? I'm like come back to calm, come back to calm. Where's the calm in this, right here Again, the circumstance. Where's the calm you can find it.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

And do you find it through journaling, prayer, meditation, all of the above?

Nika Maples:

Journaling. For sure, my habit is to set a timer. I love timers and I'm like, because with a timer, you feel like, well, I can do this for five minutes. Yeah, even if it's the worst thing in the world, I can do it for five minutes. Well, for me, I'm like 15 minutes a day. Writing in a journal is non-negotiable, and I don't write chronological, I write emotional, so I don't write. This is what I did today. I'm like, this is what I felt today and I write my feelings down for 15 minutes.

Nika Maples:

That makes me return to calm, because I think we're all trying to get ourselves to listen to ourselves and we're so busy and like, oh, be quiet. We say to our heart, be quiet, I got these things to do. But if I'm like, ok, return to calm, I will set a timer for 15 minutes. Maybe turn on the rain sounds or like emotions. So just write this is what I'm feeling and it usually just calms me down.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, that's a good one. You have encouraged me to set a timer when I'm journaling and it really does help, because then I'm not like wondering how much longer yeah.

Nika Maples:

That's a good one. Or like I do not have time to sit down and do this today and I mean, if you're thinking I've got to tell, if I start telling what happened today, I'm going to have to give the background of what's happened in the last six weeks. I might throw that out. You don't have to do a daily chronology of everything that occurred, but just to say how you feel. You don't even have to give the backstory to it, just feel crummy today.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, I feel sad or I feel excited, I mean, all the things, good and bad.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, give it in a little bit of airtime. It's essentially, and then you can get on with your day and it makes you better able to articulate. When you are with a friend or a loved one who's ready to listen and wants to ask how you are, you're better able to articulate it and say, well, actually I'm feeling this way.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, instead of our kind of standard answered I'm fine, how are you?

Nika Maples:

Exactly, we sit back because we don't want to get into it. Yeah, absolutely Don't get into it with yourself before. I think you can say I'm feeling sad today, but it's all right, I'm feeling sad, I'm going to be able to do it.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah.

Nika Maples:

I'm feeling sad today?

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, because I'm covering those emotions. It helps your creative work so much. Uh-huh, Not just what we label as negative emotions, the positive ones too.

Nika Maples:

Uh-huh.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Uh-huh yeah. What do you feel about your ability to create what you want? Oh what do you mean, Like, what do you believe about your ability to create what you want? I mean because you are someone that I know to have an idea, follow through and get to the outcome, and I don't think most people are like that.

Nika Maples:

Honestly, Most things. I'm like I believe that I can do it If I'm willing to try it. I think I'm going to get, I'll figure it out. And it has to do with I'm not quite so worried about step 27. Yeah, you know, I'm just. I know what step two is. Uh-huh, if I do step two, then I'll know what step three is and I don't have to know step 27.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, but that's one of the reasons I feel so confident. I'm confident in my ability to figure things out. Yeah, and like right now, one of my biggest goals, I just am like I just think maybe one day I'll own a building. I want to own a building, an entertainment space that has a stage and people can come and see like live events. I don't know what it would be, I hadn't thought it out, how the money would come in exactly. You know well, there's lots of steps between me now that does not own a building, to the me that owns a building. There's a ton of steps and I don't know what they are and I'm not ready to take the first one yet, but I keep believing in that. Like I keep saying, one day I'm going to own a building. I can't, yeah.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I'm sorry I interrupted. I think the continuing to nurture the thought and the idea is part of your step one or two. I mean just not dismissing it.

Nika Maples:

Right, not dismissing it like that would be too hard. What if it's easy? What if it's easy? Yeah, in the end and so. But as far as other things that I haven't done yet that I want to, I feel confident I can figure it out. A shorter term goal that seems a little more straightforward is writing a fiction book. There's not quite so many steps as buying a building, so I'm like writing a fiction book. I've never done that. I'm sure I can figure it out. I always tell my clients I'm like avail yourself of YouTube University. Oh to, youtube University is free. Tuition is free. You might not get all the best teachers, but you keep hunting until you find somebody that is a reliable source. Yeah, you always like move on. When you're like, eh, this is not good teaching. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure if I decide to really grow with fiction writing, I can find tons of videos with tons of advice offering something to me about fiction writing. Now, the danger is spending all your time researching.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes, yes.

Nika Maples:

Spending all your time watching, consuming, being inspired yeah, right, right. But I love action. I love action so much that I don't really stay stuck just watching. Yeah, I always am like, okay, tell me just enough to get me going, that's how I am too.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I'm like I don't want to just give me the, just enough to get me going, yes. And then I like I'm not the tech that will read the directions on something, oh my God. And then I'm like, oh man, maybe I should have read the directions.

Nika Maples:

Oh, I know.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yeah, for that Ikea thing that now you know can't get the legs on right.

Nika Maples:

Right, oh, this piece was supposed to go that way.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I know, and why do I have all these extra screws? I guess it's fine. And what are you grateful for?

Nika Maples:

But you know, I am so grateful for experiences. I love when someone goes a little extra to make a nice experience. I mean because I can be general and say I'm grateful for everything. But, like when I step into like I went to head brunch yesterday and they had brush squeezed orange juice instead of like and I was like, oh, that's just nice. They offered something extra. It tasted so much better than most brunch places that just serve you regular orange juice from a bottle. You know this was extra. The girl who served, she just had that little extra.

Nika Maples:

In the bathroom the tiles were not ordinary, they were just extra cute. I mean, there was something, every little detail that were small details, from the way the servers had been trained to interact to the food, the way they often slated the food and offered the food to the decor here, there and everywhere. You just noticed the little things that I was like I am grateful for an experience. I don't walk through life blind to the details. I love the details so much. I'm like I went watch my nephew. He was in a regional choir concert and we went into this auditorium to hear him sing with other 13 year olds. I was like, ah, it smells so good Like they had to do something to make it smell this good. In here. It smells like a museum. To me, I'm like they had to do something to make it smell this good, because normally high school auditorium is just.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I was going to say, were you and I high school?

Nika Maples:

I was like they did something. It smells like the modern art museum in the best way. How did they do this? And I love? Well, I think they had done something to make it transformative because it was regional, so they had All these people were dressed up more than they would have been when they were passing out the programs. I'm like, I love details, I'm grateful for experiences. I notice all of the details and take it all in, and I like to give people that feeling. When they come into a coaching hall with me, when they come to my event, I want them to have all the and for my event this weekend, we filled the bathroom with flowers and we had bath and body works, lotion and soaps in there. Because it was an industrial bathroom, we liked that soap. Yeah, no, we had like faces of flowers and it's nicer soap. I'm giving people an experience.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yes.

Nika Maples:

And I do that because I like it so much myself I leave going. Oh, did you notice the bathroom? Yes, I love that. That's what I'm grateful for right now.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

That's great. I mean, yes, that was the use of the word great a little too much in that sentence, but that's a wonderful thing to be grateful for. Just noticing the tiny details so good. Yeah, so this has been lovely. I appreciate you being with me so much. I could talk to you all day.

Nika Maples:

Yeah, me too, it has been fun.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I know Well, what do you want to share with the audience, like where can they find you? Do you have anything coming up or any of your wise?

Nika Maples:

words. Yeah, I just want to tell I like giving people a possibility explosion. So I hope on this podcast episode, you have sensed a possibility explosion in your heart that something has said wait, I can write a book, wait, I can do an event, wait, I can just feel so possible. And so if you want more of that where you feel that possibility explosion, maybe through Instagram or through Facebook, I'm Nika Maples. Everywhere, just in IKA Maples. I also have a YouTube channel, so even if you're not planning to write a book, you might like just constantly being reminded that all things are possible.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

I love that You're such a bright light. Thank you so much. Well, I will link to all that too in the show notes, and I can't wait to share this with people.

Nika Maples:

Yay, and I will do the same. Thank you so much.

Lea Ann Slotkin :

Yay, I'm so happy. Thank you so much for listening to Mind Over Media and Podcast today. If you found the episode inspiring, please share it with a friend or post it on social media and tag me on Instagram at Leigh Ann Slotkin, or head to my website, wwwleighannslotkincom. To book a discovery call to find out more about working with me one on one. You can also head to my website to get a great tool I've created for you to use when planning your own online launch of your artwork. It's an exercise I've taken many of my coaching clients through and it's been very helpful. It's my way of saying thank you and keep creating.